Remembering November

Not in a good way I must say. Dalam pada I tengah happy welcoming November ni, ada perkara yang terjadi. Kinda frustrated with what has happened, but tak pelah. I take it as a challenge! Lepas ni jangan harap I akan balik lambat lagi! NO WAY!! 

Things happen macam ni..

I was in for work sharp pukul 8.30am. Then I had my breakfast (breakfast time is during anytime before office hour start till 8.45). Betul lepas 8.45am I went back to my workstation. Macam biasa, start the morning with checking my inbox, bukak google reader looking for any updated blog and open it in a new tab. Bila free sikit i can take my time to read up the blog(s).

I'm using gmail, ada gtalk (usually I gtalk with Mr.H, you know lah, lebih jimat lebih cepat). Nama pun dah husband, apa lah sangat nak di gtalk kan. Setakat cakap I'm coming home a bit late, I'm having lunch with sekian sekian, I'm off to lunch now, leceh lah system kat my office ni, eh dear u try baca this blog..kelakar! Ok fine, it's consider chit chatting, but it doesnt affect my assignment. I did finish my task on time. I buat everything siap. 

And so I'm doing my rutine at that time. Then came my senior...

"Ema, akak nak cakap sikit lah. Time kerja jangan lah nak ber'facebook-facebook'(mind you my office dah block smua social networking sites and I tak tau mana dia dapat the idea I'm FB-ing. Kalau on mobile pun I'm not doing it during work - ok tipu,ada lah during work but once a while. Bila agak-agak otak tepu), asyik main internet jer."

"Eh, manade saya main facebook, kat sini mana boleh bukak facebook"

"Abis tu yang kat tab bawah tu apa?"

"Itu email saya." sambil opening the tab showing her the email.

"Tak kisah lah apa pun, time kerja, kerja lah sebab TAK FAIR lah untuk kitorang. Kitorang kat sini banyak kerja."

"Eh, tapi kerja saya semua siap kan?"

"Tak kisah lah tu, daripada belakang orang tengok tak ni lah. Orang lain semua buat kerja (ye lah sangat tu, padahal ada je PC kat situ yang tak kena block FB and they were FB-ing terang terangan)"

"Hmm..Yelah"

My ears rasa panas sangat. My cheeks are blushing. She sounded me in front of the whole department with her loud and clear voice. Definitely semua orang dengar. That department is not that big. 

I admit that I'm wrong for misusing the company's internet facilities for my own personal use. But that doesn't mean I'm neglacting my work there. I do chat on gtalk once a while tapi bukannyer jejaskan my job. I admit I do google things for my personal interest still, I did finish up my work on time. 

What ever I do, I'm still putting my job on top of everything when I'm at work. I'm frustrated because of what she said 'It's NOT FAIR to others'. Tell me what is fair? They can go to cafeteria anytime they want to have breakfast, they spend nearly hours during tea break (which I dont take at all, maybe sometimes je) and chit chatting there. And working late to finish their work. Fair enuff lah sebab dorang dah take working hours dorang untuk break. So, pandai lah cover balik. I'm just peeking my gtalk once a while (alaa, macam korang  tengok message kat handphone lah). Cakap pasal handphone, bos I sound cakap jangan asyik tengok handphone je. Tak paham betul. It's called multitasking ya. Apa yang penting kerja siap on time. I may be a bit slow at first sebab I'm new to the system. I'm trying to learn as fast as I can but accusing me always internet-ing during work sangat lah dumb. It's all about online nowadays. To me ape yang penting, kerja siap. Kenapa perlu bezakan kerja sama banyak ke tak. Dah terang-terang dia SENIOR OFFICER kat situ, tangga gaji pun SENIOR juga, jadi worklad pun harus lah SENIOR! Why must there be issues on fair or not kerja SENIOR banyak dari executive entry level nih?

Haaaaaiiii..entah lah. Macam ni lah kalau kerja dengan company yang semua nya Melayu. I dont know why, but Melayu dan sifat dengki nya tak pernah luput. I've see this thing coming sebenarnya. Though I felt humiliated jugak (macam kena lempang laju-laju depan orang ramai), I feel funny. Funny how the world evolves, the technology evolves but not their mindset, not their views. Tak sepadan dengan arus perkembangan semasa. Terlalu lama agaknya berada di comfort zone. 

I'm blaming myself for being too advance in this matter. Ye lah, I'm forecasting my future, but they are forecasting next few hours. 

I guess that is why makin ramai yang give up working under an organization. The beaurocracy, the politics, the suck-up asses is too tiring. All you want to do is work, earn and live a happy live. These people, wont let you do so. Jadi to survive, my husband always said...

Quit or suck it up unless you have other choice.

Suck it up je lah. I got no choice.